Being in love... What is that anyway? Do we all even reach that? Can we reach that? Or do our natural defenses protect us as soon as the caution flags spring up just as soon as the situation reaches risky status... or the "danger zone"...
It's funny to me that we dive into it knowing we are entering that zone and feel a little uncomfortable, but don't mind it too much as long as the risk has a safety net... Which would ultimately be what we originally set out for.
Sometimes I feel brave and then I feel timid and nervous. When I am brave I don't think I am risking possibly enough. Or something that I hold at a great value. Maybe what I feel should be valued or appreciated I really do not value or appreciate at all... Like money. I need it, I want it, I can not function with out it, but do I really value it like the value I place on it? Probably not when I buy a clutch when I need gas.
What am I saying? Am I just babbling? Sort of... But I know my ideas and thoughts. It all makes sense to me. Honestly, I have been in situations and seen people in situations over the past few months and you know what I think everyone values or has appreciation for mostly? Rejection. So what does this mean? Are we a society that is derived on the idea of not being lonely, even the abstractly awkward artists who obtains physical loneliness most of his life, pulling out brilliant pieces of art being in that state... Yeah, well, I think that in all honesty connection is what we are all longing for. To not be "lonely." I know I am not into rejection. In fact I reject rejection. How do we overcome this? When our appreciation is for this? I have no idea. Maybe we never do. Maybe we keep repeating the grueling steps of trying to hold this non loneliness in our lives. Maybe we spend most of our lives in a lonely state while trying to find a solution to our loneliness... Maybe it's the loneliness that ultimately keeps us company. Maybe we accept that and maybe that is our lives. I really have no idea. This is all just my stages of thought...
It's funny to me that we dive into it knowing we are entering that zone and feel a little uncomfortable, but don't mind it too much as long as the risk has a safety net... Which would ultimately be what we originally set out for.
Sometimes I feel brave and then I feel timid and nervous. When I am brave I don't think I am risking possibly enough. Or something that I hold at a great value. Maybe what I feel should be valued or appreciated I really do not value or appreciate at all... Like money. I need it, I want it, I can not function with out it, but do I really value it like the value I place on it? Probably not when I buy a clutch when I need gas.
What am I saying? Am I just babbling? Sort of... But I know my ideas and thoughts. It all makes sense to me. Honestly, I have been in situations and seen people in situations over the past few months and you know what I think everyone values or has appreciation for mostly? Rejection. So what does this mean? Are we a society that is derived on the idea of not being lonely, even the abstractly awkward artists who obtains physical loneliness most of his life, pulling out brilliant pieces of art being in that state... Yeah, well, I think that in all honesty connection is what we are all longing for. To not be "lonely." I know I am not into rejection. In fact I reject rejection. How do we overcome this? When our appreciation is for this? I have no idea. Maybe we never do. Maybe we keep repeating the grueling steps of trying to hold this non loneliness in our lives. Maybe we spend most of our lives in a lonely state while trying to find a solution to our loneliness... Maybe it's the loneliness that ultimately keeps us company. Maybe we accept that and maybe that is our lives. I really have no idea. This is all just my stages of thought...
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